The big fish said, “But, you’re already swimming in it!”
The little fish replied, “Oh no, this is just water. Excuse me while I go find someone else who knows better.”
=====
Excuse me, but can you tell me where God is?
The Last Lesson
The next morning, the disciples came but the master was nowhere to be found. Instead, they saw a small note saying, “Do not try to find me. I have said all that needs to be said to you, and have done all that needs to be done. Now, remember the lessons and go and live your own lives.”
The Most Precious Secret
The disciples wanted to know the different stages the master had to go through in his quest for enlightenment.
The master said, “Well, in the beginning, I was full of action. I thought enlightenment lay in doing kind and worthy deeds. Then I went through suffering and pain, and I stayed there until I could control my heart and stay unattached to anything. I learned to love, and my passion consumed my very core, burning away the self and all its petty desires. Then, I learned to be silent. In silence, I contemplated the mysteries of life and death and they gave up their secrets to me.”
The master paused to sip some tea.
“But finally,” he continued, “I learned the most precious secret of all.”
“And what is that?” asked the disciples.
“I learned to laugh,” replied the master as he howled with glee.
The Book of Wisdom
An elderly monk became famous in his town because of the appropriate and wise advice he would give to those who sought his counsel. Even the other monks and the head monk himself would go to him for advice on many matters. They always marveled at his words and the ease with which he seemingly plucked them from the air.
The words would always hit their mark. If someone needed inspiration, he would find it. If another needed brutal frankness, she would get it as well.
The elderly monk got seriously ill one day and the other monks were concerned. What would happen when this holy man was gone? Where would they turn to for advice and counsel? The sick monk inadvertently heard their whispered fears and immediately understood their concern. He called them and said, “I shall record all the wisdom that you need in a book so that when I pass away, you will have something to guide you. But you have to promise to only open it when I am gone. Now, hurry and bring me pen and paper.”
The other monks gave him a thick notebook and a pen so he could spend his waking hours writing and recording his wisdom. For the next few days, the monks who visited would see him sitting up in bed with the notebook open, and they would not stay overly long for fear of disturbing him from his work.
Three weeks after, on a fine Sunday morning, they found him sleeping peacefully in bed, his hands folded over the notebook in his chest. They understood with great sadness that this was the sleep from which no one wakes. The head monk came and reverently lifted the precious notebook from underneath the folded hands. He opened it and to his surprise, found that all the pages were blank except the last one.
And what was written there was this:
“What is in me is also in you.
You are no more than me and I no more than you.
Look within.
Search deep within.
There lies the fount of all wisdom.”
Stop eating chocolates
A mother in a small village had a little boy who absolutely loved chocolates. He would eat too much and too often that the mother feared that it would be bad for him. She approached the village elder and said, “Elder, I have a problem. My boy eats a lot of chocolate and I am afraid it will harm him. Could you please tell him to stop eating chocolate?”
The elder said, “I can help you, but give me some time. Then I will go to your house and talk to your boy.”
A day passed, then two, then three – but the elder did not come.
A week passed, then two, then three – and finally, the elder came to the house. He called the boy, looked him straight in the eye and said, “You must stop eating chocolate. It is not good for your health.” He spoke with such authority and conviction that the boy promised he would never touch chocolate again.
The mother thanked the elder, but could not help saying, “Elder, I am grateful that you came to help me. But why did it take you three weeks to come and tell my boy to stop eating chocolates?”
The elder replied, “It is very simple. Three weeks ago, I had not yet stopped eating chocolates.”